Love,relationships

Why relationships breakup after baby!!

If the child is born at an early stage of 3 to 4 years of marriage, approximately 2/3rd of the couples find difficult to handle the new life and their quality of relationship starts declining.

Let’s understand it in a way of story:

There was a couple who had dreamt for a child for so long and when their child was born, both husband and wife thought that they have become the happiest family in the world. Both husband and wife were ready to face the new challenges of the life. But slowly the husband started loosing patience. The cry of the child at night made the husband irritated as he couldn’t sleep and keep cribbing to his wife that he have to go to the office in the morning.

The husband annoyance compelled him to sleep in another room. Soon he started to work late in the office. Avoided his wife phone calls. He failed to understand his responsiblity towards the child as a father. He failed to understand how tired his wife must be. How badly she must be needing the change and rest. But instead of helping his wife on weekends, he started spending time with his friends.

Every day the wife hoped that it would get easier soon. They would be like a family again but the husband had something else in mind. He made a different decision. He said sorry, a child takes a whole lot of energy and I have to pay more time in building up my career. So the time and attention what a child needed from his father was not given. With the period of time the wife did everything what she could do best for her child. She never gave up for the sake of her child. As the child grew, mother and the child coped up with all the difficulties. When one day husband comes with a bouquet and says how much he missed her, but she refuses to acknowledge him.

A child is a challenge for a family. If you think you are not ready for the responsibility till a particular period of time than don’t take it. Because a person who ran from the responsibilities and difficulties once, will definitely do so again.

It’s very important for the partners to communicate and sort the things among themselves before having a child. One should discuss the responsibilities that they have to face without avoiding and division of work too. Because have often seen, maximum responsibilities come upon the mother, especially when the child is a toddler. Each stage is difficult but the matter is how you manage.

 

48 thoughts on “Why relationships breakup after baby!!

  1. Yes your analysis is almost true, men many times won’t understand there responsibility as women do, especially in joint family men don’t even take care. But in reality I had seen many men who takes care for the second child more than the first one, especially when the difference between first and second one is more. I feel for them it takes time to fit into as father. Including my husband (also his friends) takes more care during second child also my husband feels bad he didn’t cared much for the first child as he did for the second. In our case age difference for children is nine years but four or six years difference is also bringing good change.

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    1. Thank you so much for such lovely thought well explained!! I agree thatโ€™s the case with many.. other way round have seen many parents now days there attitude toward children which led me with the question mark and give a thought to the topic

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  2. This is true, taking care of a kid is a big responsibility which needs a lot of patience.. communication is the key to manage situation and enjoy this beautiful experience!

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  3. This could be true as well. Based on personal experience, communication is the key. The couple should open up to each other, which sometimes is very hard when the other person is domeenering but at the end of the day, love can do wonders.

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  4. Very true. Having kids can definitely suck the romance out of a marriage. Youโ€™re always tired and always busy so itโ€™s difficult to make time for your spouse. Sometimes (ok most of the time) I feel like the only topics I talk to my husband about are the kids, the house, and what needs to be done. Gone are the days of interesting conversations! Thatโ€™s why itโ€™s so important to take the time to be a couple again! If youโ€™d like any ideas on date night ideas for the Winter you can check out my post! https://survivingtilbedtime.com/2018/10/31/10-cold-weather-date-night-ideas-fun/

    Hope that helps!
    Jen

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    1. I canโ€™t say they may create a whole hell of the problems but the purpose is if you are planning to have kid both parents should be mental agreed with each other regarding the pros and cons and see if their situation allows to take the responsibility and itโ€™s the responsibility of both as parents together and not the whole burden lies on one the shoulder of one parent.
      Rest is how every individual feels

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  5. Iโ€™ve certainly seen this to be true. My husband and I have decided weโ€™re not ready for kids and it was the best decision for us despite peer pressure. It allowed us to grow as a couple and a team before embarking on such an important responsibility. Raising children seems to be getting harder and harder and a strong team is needed to raise product members of society. I recently read an article about how children change a marriage and how to cope with those changes. Hereโ€™s a link: https://www.jw.org/finder?wtlocale=E&docid=2011329&srcid=share

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  6. That’s very true. I’ve seen quite a bit of men who let their wives handle the kids, because that’s what WOMEN are supposed to do, while they take things for granted.

    It would be a wonder to watch the child grow and see who they bond with more, the mother or the father. The kids always tend to lash out on their parents once they become teenagers. We have very little time to bond with our kids and make memories.

    The sooner men realize the better it will be to avoid future regrets where their child respects the mother whilst ignoring the father.

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